#FUNNY · 38 ASKS

roommate boiled hot dogs in our keurig at 2am, group chat is losing it

so my roommate riggs (23m) ran outta pots doing dishes last night so he legit fed hot dogs through the keurig like it's a soup dispenser. we caught… Read more

#roommates#funny

customers keep asking if a BUS hit me (nah just derby bruises) do i finally tell them?? 🚌💥

work retail at the mall and my whole ribcage is one big bruise from practice this week. had a customer literally gasp and ask if i got hit by a bus… Read more

#derby#work#funny

my brother named his new fish after my crush and refuses to change it aio

ok so my brother (12m) got a betta fish last week and asked me to help name it and i said something like elias would be cute bc thats literally my… Read more

#crush#family#funny

neighbor asked for my wifi password. lie and say it's broken or hand it over

she's locked out of her router after an update and wants to borrow mine for a day. i live alone, no curtains, three monitors visible from her… Read more

#privacy#funny

the most useless survival advice you've been given by someone who's never spent a night out

#funny#relatable

what's the actual worst thing a customer has ever said to you with a straight face

#work#funny

gym etiquette: is it acceptable to work in with someone without asking first

#health#funny

is it weird that i still like a band i was into when i was 12

#music#funny

karaoke rule: is it acceptable to sing a song someone else already did that night

#music#funny

would you rather be great at one thing forever or good at everything for a year each

#relatable#funny

is it acceptable to leave a gig early if you've already seen the headliner before

#music#funny

is a home brewer who buys a kit still a home brewer. settle it.

#food#funny

truck stop tier list: shower quality is the only metric that matters. agree?

#work#funny

vinyl people: is it acceptable to buy a record you already own on streaming just because of the slee

#music#funny

is it cringe to wear the shoes you resell or is that the whole point

#style#funny

tattoo people: is it fine to get something you'll definitely regret if you can afford removal

#style#funny

league night: is it acceptable to bring a guest who's never bowled without warning anyone

#friends#funny

do you tell people where your patch is or take it to the grave

#food#funny

chess parents: at what age is it fine to let your kid lose to you on purpose vs never

#parenting#funny

Golden Corral banned me for life after wing night. cruel or correct?

manager said I 'exceeded reasonable buffet use' after I put down 47 wings training for Nationals. security walked me out past the mashed potato bar… Read more

#food#funny

is it acceptable to top-rope a route and then say you 'did' it

#health#funny

theres a raccoon at the same rest stop every week now and i think we're friends

same spot off I-40 near Amarillo for like three months now. same raccoon shows up when i park for the night, sits by the tire, watches me eat.… Read more

#trucking#funny

is there any point brewing at home now that good beer is everywhere

#food#funny

be honest: is competitive eating a sport

#health#funny

is losing on purpose to a younger sibling ever the right call

#family#funny

book club rule: is it acceptable to come if you didn't finish the book

#friends#funny

she called me bro after i said good morning red flag or nah fr fr 💀🔥

#dating#funny

cryptics vs quick crosswords: is one of them actually harder or is it a different skill

#relatable#funny

academics: what's the most useless thing you've been made to do for a job application

#work#funny

restaurant red flags: which one makes you leave before ordering

#food#funny

babe he showed up to our FIRST date in Crocs with socks!! deal breaker or nah?? 💅🔥

okay so i matched with this guy Tony on Hinge, 34, said he's a "pilot" (turned out to be a flight attendant lol whatever fine) and we set up drinks… Read more

#dating#funny

comics: what's the heckle you've never had a good answer to

#work#funny

is a hobby still a hobby if you've never once finished anything

#relatable#funny

thrifted jeans that still have someone elses gum in the pocket or a shirt with a mystery stain 😭

#thrifting#funny

bro at my gym racks his weights but leaves the chalk dust like a crime scene wya for the poll

this dude benches 225 then walks off leaving chalk clouds all over the bench like he committed a murder 💀 i had to fan the air just to lay down fr… Read more

#aita#fitness#funny

babe a client tried to pay me in a HALF used candle instead of tip!! wyd

girl came in for a fill, chatted my ear off, then dropped a Bath & Body Works candle (like 70% burned down!!) on my station and said 'this is better… Read more

#work#funny

babe is it wrong that i judge people by their acrylic length at the buffet?? 💅🔥

had a client come in yesterday with SIX INCH stiletto nails and she was trying to pick up shrimp at the buffet like a lil crab claw!! babe i almost… Read more

#food#funny

my thrifted pothos cutting is thriving better than the $40 one from the nursery... AITA for feeling

found a random pothos cutting in a $2 thrift store mug and it's out here growing like it owns the place while my fancy nursery plant just sits there… Read more

#aita#gardening#thrifting#funny