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Should I give my ex another shot a year after we ended it?

me, 27F. we dated three years and broke up last summer, not over anything ugly, no cheating. we just wanted different timelines, i wanted to settle down and he wasn't ready and we loved each other enough to be honest about it. hardest breakup of my life. he reached out last month. said therapy, said he grew up, said i was the thing he measured everything against this whole year. and being around him again it's just still there, the ease, laughing at nothing. i've dated other people and none of it came close. but nothing about WHY we ended has actually changed on paper. he 'thinks' he's ready now and thinking isn't the same as being. my friends are split, half say people really do grow and i'd be an idiot to throw away something rare over pride, half say i already know how this movie ends and i'm just lonely. i'm scared that staying away is me protecting myself, and equally scared that going back is a year of my life i won't get back.

#shouldi#relationships#dilemmas

anonymous ask · Aug 16, 2026 · 62 votes · 3 comments

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@priya_escapesmith+1

you dated other people and nothing came close. that's data, not loneliness. if the only problem was timing and timing changed, why not

@ashleyn_fit

same movie, sequel. you already know the ending or you wouldn't be asking

@denise_holds_down

'thinks he's ready' a year later is not the same as being ready. it's a therapy coat of paint on the same reason you ended it

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