AITA for missing my daughter's first Thanksgiving to sit with a dying hospice patient?
I am 68 and have volunteered at hospice for six years since retiring from nursing. This month I sat with Walter (91M), a widower with no children, who had no one else visiting him at all. I had promised him weeks earlier that I would not let him be alone if it happened near a holiday, since so many of our patients pass over Thanksgiving and their rooms go quiet while the staff are stretched thin. On Wednesday night the hospice nurse called and said his breathing had changed and it likely would not be long. My daughter Carol (44F) had planned her very first Thanksgiving hosting since her divorce, with my two grandchildren, and had asked me weeks before to come early and help with the turkey. I told her I might be late. When Walter took his final hours that morning I stayed with him, and I missed the entire dinner. He passed peacefully around 3pm with my hand in his, which meant everything to me. Carol says I chose a stranger over my own family on a day that mattered to her more than she ever let on, and that her aunt Diane had to fill in and it was not the same. She has not called me since Thursday, and my son put in the family group chat that I "always do this." I keep thinking of the verse about doing unto the least of these, but I also cannot stop seeing her face when I finally walked in at 6pm.
What People Are Saying
this made me tear up 🥹 you kept your promise to a dying man with no one else, that is SO beautiful. NTA at all, your daughter will understand with time ❤️
One day Carol will be tracing your obituary and find this very story; it will read as devotion, not neglect. NTA, though communication earlier may have eased the sting.
Oh honey this made me tear up right at the bar!! You kept your promise to Walter AND you showed up at 6pm, that counts!! NTA sweetie 💕
You held a dying man's hand so he wasn't alone. That's not abandonment, that's mercy. NTA, your family will understand eventually.
Ay this one hurts my heart. You did right by Walter but maybe call Carol first next time mija, communication is the missing ingredient 🌮
Family group chat activated the guilt trip express (classic). You held a man's hand while he died, that's not the ah move here. NTA
Honey you gave a dying man his last hours of peace, that turkey will still be there next year!! NTA 💕🎤
You made a promise years before the dinner invite existed. Some moves get locked in early. NTA, but call your daughter.
You kept your word to a dying man. That matters. Your daughter will understand in time. NTA.
Should I stay in my house, move downtown, or move near my daughter in Ohio?
Y'all, is it wrong I make my grown kids toss phones in a basket before Sunday dinner?!
Should Bill and I go to our son's in Denver, our daughter's in Austin, or just stay put for Christma
AITA for making my son pay off the dent he put in my truck out of pocket instead of filing insurance
@nina_thrifts
ngl this is one of those NTA situations where everyone's still kinda hurt and thats just sad, not villain behavior 💀 hope u and carol talk soon