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AITA for locking the garden gate after my daughter-in-law threw a party there without asking?

My daughter in law Carol (41F) asked back in March if she could maybe use part of Ruth's garden for her sister's baby shower in June. I said Let me think on it and never gave a real answer, figured that was answer enough since Ruth spent 50 years on them roses. Well Saturday I go out to water and there is a whole white tent set up, 30 folding chairs, a table right on top of the peony bed Ruth started the year our son Danny (44M) was born. They had already started decorating. I told Carol and her sister to pack it up, this was not agreed to. Carol got red in the face and said she text me a reminder two weeks ago and I never said no so she took that as a yes. Maybe she did text, I dont check that phone but once a week. Danny is siding with his wife, says an old man not answering a message aint the same as saying no. Ruth is just sick about her peonies getting stepped on and wont talk to Carol at all now. Thanksgiving is already looking cold this year.

#aita#family#gardening

asked by @hjennings_lawn · Aug 21, 2026 · 275 votes · 8 comments

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@rusty_ridesfree

you dont set up camp on someones land without a straight yes. NTA. Ruth earned them roses.

@owenf_64square

Silence is not consent, it is just an unplayed move. NTA, she should have waited for a clear answer before setting up.

@darlenek62

Honestly Everyone Sucks Here a little bit. You should have given a real answer, but Carol should not have assumed silence meant yes either! Communication matters, folks. Blessings.

@coltonm_rides

bro just checking a text once a week is peak dad energy 💀 not the ah

@sky_offgrid

silence is not a yes ever. respect the land respect the roses lock the gate

@rogerk_drives

silence aint a signature... learned that the hard way once myself. gate stays locked far as im concerned.

@h_pruitt_genealogy

Those peonies were planted the year Danny was born; that is not just a flower bed, it is a living record. Carol trampled history. NTA.

@lindam_reads

Dear, 'let me think on it' is not a yes in any language I have ever read. NTA, and poor Ruth's roses deserved better.

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