AITA for digging way deeper into my friend's boyfriend than she asked me to
my friend Dana (31F) has been dating this guy Kyle for like 8 months. two weeks ago she asks me, half joking, to "just google him" because something felt off. i do cybersecurity for a living so she knows i can actually find stuff, not just google. i told her i'd do a basic pass. instead i pulled reverse image search on his profile pics, cross referenced usernames across three platforms, found a dating app profile active from last week and a second instagram under a fake name he uses to DM other women. took me maybe 40 minutes, this is literally my job. i sent her screenshots with timestamps and everything laid out like a report because that's how my brain works. she did not react the way i expected. she's furious, says i went way past "just check him out" and now she feels like i surveilled her boyfriend without consent, calls it creepy even though it's HER boyfriend and i did it FOR her. she's not answering my texts. mutual friends are split, one said i basically catfished my way into his private accounts, another said i just did what she asked and she's shooting the messenger. Dana is still with Kyle as far as i know.
What People Are Saying
She gave a command, you followed it. Don't get mad at the messenger for doing the job right. NTA.
She asked ya to check the guy out, ya did. Dana's mad at the truth not at ya. NTA.
She asked. You found the truth. Not your fault she dont like it. NTA
Dear, she asked you to look into him and you found real red flags — that is not surveillance, that is due diligence. NTA.
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@baileyf_grows
i get it came from love but 40 min deep diving someone's private life is a lot... maybe ESH here 🌙