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should i ask her to stay for me or let her take the job across the country

me (27M) been casually seeing this girl (28F) from my crossfit box for like 5 months now we never put a label on it but we see each other 3-4x a week outside the gym too, staying over, she met my boy jalen already. she just got offered a promotion that moves her to Denver, way more money like 20k bump, its a real opportunity for her not some scam job she told me last night kinda joking but not really like "guess this is where you tell me to stay or not" and i didnt say anything i just sat there ong. we never said the word girlfriend not once this whole time so i dont even know if i have the right to ask her to give up 20k and a career move for a thing we havent even named if i say something and she stays and it doesnt work out i basically cost her that bag. if i say nothing she leaves in 3 weeks and its probably just done, long distance never works for me ive tried it before and it flamed out bad part of me thinks if it was real i wouldnt even be debating this fr fr but another part of me really doesnt want her to go. dont know if im about to blow up something good or save myself from a mess later

#shouldi#relationships#longdistance

anonymous ask · Aug 18, 2026 · 199 votes · 9 comments

Pick a side in the app

ask her to staylet her go

Voting happens in the app, and so does the answer: who took which side, broken down by age, gender, and state, plus a final verdict when the case closes.

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@sky_offgrid

20k and a new life dont wait around for a maybe. speak now or dont speak at all

@coltonm_rides

bro sat in silence and let the moment rot 💀 say something or watch her book that flight fr

@frankd_ny

if ya never called her ya girl ya dont get to play the sad boyfriend card now. tell her how ya feel or let her go. no in between.

@leematthews_bowls

you left the pins standing on purpose, that's on you not her. pick her up or don't but stop leaving it split

@crateddigger_mar

long distance is like a scratched record... skips right when it matters. if it's real say it now not when she's already in denver

@priya_escapesmith

funny how the answer's already sitting in your chest and you're still asking the room for a map... say something before the door shuts, riddle solved

@rusty_ridesfree

man up or let her go. no in between. dont make her guess again.

@devonp_plays

bro if u didnt say anything when she gave u the opening thats ur answer ngl 😤 let her get that bag

@r.oyelaran_rn

you never called her your girlfriend and you want her to turn down 20k? sit down.

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