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AITA for finally calling out an old friend over a $500 loan he never repaid in 12 years?

My friend Arthur (79M) and I have played chess together every Thursday at the public library for nearly twenty years. In 2012, when my late wife was in the hospital, I lent him $500 because his car had broken down and he needed it for work. He said he would pay me back within a month. He never did, and I never pressed the matter, because that is not the kind of thing you nag a friend about, or so I thought. Last month Arthur showed up in a brand new Buick and spent the next hour telling everyone at our chess table how he finally treated himself after years of saving. Something in me snapped. I asked him, in front of the other four men at the table, whether the $500 he owed me had factored into that decision at all. He turned red and said he did not even remember borrowing it, which I know is a lie because I still have the text where he thanked me for it. He has not spoken to me since, and two of the other men have told me I embarrassed him for no good reason and should have handled it privately. Maybe they are right. I am 76 and I do not have unlimited patience left for pretending old debts do not exist.

#aita#friends

asked by @walt_crosswordguy · Aug 19, 2026 · 169 votes · 6 comments

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@felixz_infosec

He 'doesnt remember' but you have the text receipts. Case closed. NTA, maybe skip public shaming next time though.

@rogerk_drives

Twelve years is a long time to carry something quiet... he had the money the whole time, just not for you. NTA.

@gmetz_fixit

Buyin a Buick before payin back a friend? Nah. Back in my day a debt was a debt, didnt matter how small. NTA.

@denise_holds_down

Twelve years of patience and he still played dumb? That's not memory loss, that's OPSEC (operational security) for his guilty conscience. NTA.

@darlenek62

Oh honey, you were patient for TWELVE years! He chose the wrong Thursday to brag about that car. Blessings, but he had it coming!

@e.voss.writes

Twelve years of silence followed by a new Buick is not exactly subtle; timing is its own kind of confession (NTA, though a quieter word beforehand might have spared the audience).

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